For those of us who identify as Indian, South Asian, or part of the Indian Diaspora, we face a complicated balancing act of bridging space between different groups.
Hi, I’m Kavita. I provide online couples therapy and marriage counseling in California that is insight and depth-oriented with a social justice lens. I specialize in relationship issues, South Asian mental health, life transitions, and anxiety. I have openings for new clients throughout California. My cultural awareness is an integral aspect of our work. Learn more about me.
No matter how you define your relationship — dating, living together, engaged, married, life partners — our need for love and connection is the same. So, why do relationships feel so challenging? How we show up for and what we want from our partner is influenced by a variety of factors. Some of us were molded by our parents’ expectations and cultural norms. The norms and family systems in which you and your partner were raised influence your beliefs about parenting, communication style, gender roles, expectations for closeness and intimacy, and the level of involvement of parents and extended family members.
We learn about relationships from our own parents. The way your parents and your partner’s parents treated each other, expressed and showed love and affection for one another, behaved when they disagreed or argued, etc., influence how you interact and communicate with one another in your relationship.
Furthermore, your relationships with your parents and with past partners influence your current relationship. These interactions and experiences with significant others affect your sense of self, attachment style and needs, and core vulnerabilities. In order to have a healthy relationship, you need a healthy relationship with yourself first.
In our therapy relationship, you experience new ways of relating. I’ll help you discover how your deep-rooted beliefs were formed by other people’s expectations and how unhealthy patterns from past relationships are getting repeated in your current relationship. To forge a healthy relationship with yourself, we work on developing self-esteem and identity, and understanding your attachment style and vulnerabilities. I help partners identify and understand how each of your core vulnerabilities interact to thwart empathy, stoke destructive communication and conflict, and foment distrust, alienation, anger, shame, and a loss of intimacy. You learn how to communicate with curiosity and empathy and with the intention of increasing understanding. Greater understanding fosters intimacy, connection, and resilience in the relationship, so it can bloom.
Contact me for a free, confidential phone consultation. We’ll talk about how I can help you. We’ll find out if we are a good fit. Get started by filling out this short form.